My life's been going pretty well recently. I imagine that being on summer break has a lot to do with the general good mood I've been in, but I can also honestly say that there have just been a lot of things to make me happy lately.

At the top of the list is Stephanie. She made up her mind in early July that she wanted to move in with me. Obviously she needed to finish college first, but she had been sort of unsure what she wanted to do after graduation. I had hoped she would want to come east, but didn't want to be too aggressive in convincing her to come out here. I came out here for my own reasons, and I made up my mind to move away and follow my goals, so I expect her to do differently. Fortunately, she's here now, asleep in the other room at the moment, and with half of her boxes of stuff still laying around the apartment. But we've made some solid dents in unpacking, done our Ikea and target trips to get all the random new stuff we need, and hopefully she'll be completely unpacked by the time I start school on Monday.

Speaking of which, I am now officially a second year student. We finished up Summer term at the end of June, and i can honestly say that when I turned in my final paper I felt this cool wave of relief wash over me. Even though I've only been break for 8 weeks, it strangely feels like 8 months. I left Hartford to go to Chicago for my cousins wedding, then Vegas, LA, Tucson, back to Chicago, then Stephanie and I got to Hartford and took a road trip up through Niagara Falls to Toronto, then went to Montreal, and headed back down here. A good bit of traveling for the summer. Toronto was amazing, it's a fantastic city - really clean, lots of nice people, tons of good food, and easy to walk around and find interesting things to do.

Fortunately poker's been going much better recently, and that makes both the travel and Stephanies move easier. I had a few months starting late last year and running into early this year where I was losing almost every time I sat down at a table. In early June I switched back to heads-up no-limit games and have been crushing the majority of the people who sit down to play me. I'm now playing across 4 different sites - Poker Stars, Full Tilt, Cake, and Absolute. It's unbelievable how poorly people will play. Even with the occasional streaks of awful luck (everyone's bound to have them at HU), I've been doing incredibly well here.

School starts up again on Tuesday. Classes this year are supposed to be far less intense, as the goal of the program is for us to focus on our practicums. I'm going to be working at Job Corp, doing therapy and psychological testing for the students there. I was supposed to start this previous Monday, but due to some sort of mix-up, I now start for real next Monday. I'm honestly a little disappointed to have to wait to begin, since I had sort of psyched myself up (no pun intended) to get going. At this point I really am ready to just get back into the swing of things, start going to classes and practicum, and ideally begin working on my dissertation (to some minor extent right now) in the next month. I think I know where I want to go with it, and I've got an adviser on board for my idea. Now it's just a matter of seeing what's been done on it, and then using that to fine tune my concept.

Right now I'm interested in looking at the medias effect on public perception of anxiety disorders. I have a theory that people base their opinions about mental disorders primarily on what they see on TV/movies/the news, and that this information is often misleading/wrong/stigmatizing. Well, I know that the way the media portrays people with mental illness is often wrong, and the theory is that it does lead to stigma. What I really want to find out is how much influence the media really has on the average person to sway his opinion on the subject. I think it has a lot of influence. I can't even begin to guess how many people have asked me "isn't Tourettes the thing where you swear a lot?". Well, whenever TS is covered in some form of media - whether it's South Park, MTV's 'true life', or Deuce Biggalo - corpolalia (the swearing) is in the forefront. And yet, only 5% of people with TS have that problem. Do people get this stereotype from the media they watch? or do they get it from somewhere else? And this goes far beyond TS - it includes everything from OCD to Bipolar Disorder, to Schizophrenia. I'm interested in focusing on anxiety disorders, since most of the stigma research to date has focused on the more 'severe' illnesses.

Oh, and I also got a Keurig coffee maker for my birthday from my mom. If I can recommend anything that everyone should have in a household, it's a Keurig. Phenominal.

best. sesame street. ever.

So I saw this first prank a year or two ago.

At the time, I thought it was the worlds greatest prank ever pulled. ever.

Then today I discovered this on digg. It is probably 1,000x funnier. omg.

</div>

can't imbed it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LoGYx35ypus


pretty funny clip from conan. slightly funnier than joaquin phoenix

I am completely and totally incapable of working for more than 15 minutes at a time lately. I really don't know why.

after 5 hours I've managed to get enough information related to potential practicum sites for supervisors day on Tuesday. On the upside, my top choice (The Institute of Living) looks better and better by the day. Nearly everything about this program looks ideal for my first placement. On the downside, only 4 of my original 10 top choices are going to be coming to supervisors day, including my 2nd and 3rd choices. Of course, if I do manage the IOL placement, then there won't be any problems.

I've also decided that my CV sucks, and have rewritten the entire thing. I'm still not really impressed with it, but I think that might be because I'm comparing it to people who have far more experience than I do. : /

I wonder if it's reasonable to blame last nights scorpion bowl on my inability to focus today. Either that or the three cups of coffee from a few hours ago are making it too hard for me to sit still and devote my attention to one thing.

My apartment is freezing. I bought a space heater last night in an attempt to not develop hypothermia while I sleep. Currently I'm going to bed wearing flannel pajama bottoms, jeans, socks, a sweatshirt, and a fleece jacket. And I'm still cold at night. This is not normal.

I should probably just call the electric company right now, but I really dont' feel like spending half an hour on hold at the moment. Still, I need to take care of this sooner than later.

Ron finished building our bar the other day. I'm going out to get everything to stock it tonight. It's a touch over 10x4 ft (aka, huge), and the plan is to keep it completely self contained. We want it to have everything available from beer to all the ingredients for most mixed drinks, as well as appetizers, utensils, ice, etc. Once we fix the heating issue I plan to throw a 'breaking in' party. I'm excited.

I'm honestly amazed at the amount of press Michael Phelps is getting following his recent photo. It seems like people in the news, especially at ESPN, are treating this like it's hunting season. I can't help but wonder what their reactions to it would be if marijuana were legalized. I have a hard time imagining that they would rip into him like this if it was, even though he wouldn't be doing anything different.

My Psychopathology class is fun. We have a series of movies to watch - good ones too - that we have to analyze throughout the semester. This week we did American Beauty and Ordinary People, and we had to break up into teams and present a full psychiatric report on two of the characters, including diagnoses, etiology, treatment plans, etc. It's actually really fun. The DSM is my new best friend.

I've always associated certain songs with certain memories. "Joy to the World" by three dog nights will always make me think of summer camp at OSRUI. "it's great when we're together" makes me think about a 3-day van ride from Wisconsin to Utah for Noazim. "Zoot Suit Riot" reminds me of a fencing tournament I at Culver Military Academy. There's a whole list of these songs. Probably 30 or 40 that invoke certain emotions, some good, some bad. It's almost impossible for me to listen to them without visually imagining where I was when this song became a part of my life.

Driving to school today, it struck me as odd that I was listening to "Santeria" by Sublime. I first started listening to them when I moved to Redondo, and I distinctly remember listening to that song on my old CD-player the first time I walked down the strand in Hermosa. Something about that memory popping up  in my mind at 8 this morning while I was driving to school in weather so cold I could still see my breath in the car despite the heat being turned all the way up seemed very strange. I'm not sure why I find this so interesting. Maybe because I was exhausted and on a caffeine high at the time.

Today is the first day of interviews for prospective students at Hartford. I'm going to go answer questions for incoming students in a few hours. I'm kind of excited about that. One of the things that really helped me make my decisions was talking to first year students, and getting an idea of what the 'hell year' is like.

Ugly week.

Started playing poker again this week after a 2 week break. I am, of course, running awful. I just can't win lately. it sucks

I've been battling the plague since the beginning of the year. Yesterday was bad. I feel better today, but i've just had these random bouts of nausea. No fun.

School was canceled for a snow day on Wednesday. I think my last one of these was in... 7th grade?

This was fun at first, but then i realized that the entire campus was closed down, meaning I couldn't even use the library to do some work. To add to the mess, I slipped on a patch of ice walking back from the library to my car. I landed on my backpack and broke my bose headphones. I also managed to rip open my jeans in the fall, which is sort of impressive when you consider that I landed on a solid patch of ice. I have no idea what they ripped on.

The handle to my bathroom door broke the other day. While I was in the bathroom. After taking a long hot shower that turned the room into a sauna. I had to use the doorknob to pry off the hinges. Not an easy task... Not fun.

Hopefully next week goes a little better

So I've finally had all of the classes I'll be taking this semster. I'm kind of excited for some of it, kind of scared for others

*Monday: 2:00-4:30 -- Individual Psychotherapy.
I'm really looking forward to this class. The professor is really laid back, and the class is designed as a survey rather than a lecture, which means lots of discussions, roleplaying scenarios, and film study. This class is going to  be really important for my practicum (more on that later), as we're going to be expected to be familiar with various forms of therapy so we don't get stuck in one model when we're with patients.

*Wednesday: 8:30-11:00 -- Psychological Assessment II
PAI last semester dealt with intelligence testing (WAIS, WISC,WOOPSI, etc.) and touched on personality testing (MMPI). This semester we're focusing on projective measures, starting with the Rorschach inkblot test. Later on we move into the TAT and one more than I've currently forgotten. The Rorschach is going to be a challenge though. I'm not even sure how I feel about projective measures, and I've always felt that the whole ink blot deal was some antiquated Fruedian "sit back and tell me about your father" sort of thing. Still, it's widely used, and there's got to be a reason for that. I'm a little skeptical, but what good is education is you can't be challenged

*Wednesday: 2:00-4:30 -- Experimental Design II
This is a direct continatuion of EDI, and focuses mostly on a project that we're supposed to work on all semester. Ideally we'll be able to present our results at one of the psychological conferences in the fall, and if it turns out really well our professor wants us to begin publishing. I'm working with Mary on the project. We've each had to scrap our original ideas, mostly because while they seemed interesting to us individually, our professor wants us to work in teams, and neither of us was interested in the others. So we're meeting tonight to discuss some new ideas.

*Friday: 8:30-11:00 - Advanced Psychopathology
The purpose of this class is to make sure that we're well versed in the DSM-IV-TR, it's diagnoses, and the symptoms/etiology of as many disorders as possible before we start practicum. It's going to be a lot of work, but at least it's going to be interesting work. Our first weeks assignment was to watch 'One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest' and 'Gaslamp'. Our teacher wants us well versed not only in the disorders themselves, but also in the perception people have of the disorders. I like that.

There's also a Psychopharmacology workshop at some point, but it looks like I may have to wait until the summer term to take that class. I'm a little dissapointed about this because the class is going to rely heavily on what we learned last semester in Physiology, and I'd like to have that sort of information still relatively fresh before I start trying to understand how different drugs affect the body.

Ah well.

Other than that things are going alright here. Ron and I are still working on setting up the new apartment. We're building a bar for the family room. I still don't have a real bed, and have been sleeping on an air-mattress since I've gotten here. It's surprisingly comfortable, which may explain my lack of motivation to buy a real one. I'd like to get a queen-sized tempurpedic, but pokers been rough recently, and I'm not particuarlly interested in spending too much money at the moment.

The fact that the school is trying to screw me out of $3750 doesn't help. I should be able to get it back. I just need to be able to convince someone that 750x4=3000. They all seem convinced that 750x4=6750. I'm not quite sure where they learned math, but either;

A: I've made a huge mistake in my conception of multiplication
B: They've made a huge mistake in their conception of multiplication.

If it turns out that A is true, then of course I plan to applogize to everyone I've called an idiot since this started, and I'll stop pestering them through the miles of red tape I have to cross. If it turns out that B is true, then hopefully one of them realizes before I start trying to solve the problem with lawyers rather than on my own. But after getting sent in a full circle I'm starting to lose patience. Cindy says see Mark, Mark says see Cathy, Cathy says see Aaron, Aaron says see Jules, and Jules says see Cindy (names have been changed). It's really quite annoying, and to refer to the whole process as frustrating doesn't even touch the surface. It's as if every person in the financial aid department graduated has been instructed "just play dumb about everything".

I'm sitting in the airport in Atlanta, waiting for my flight to leave in 2 hours for Nassau. I have no idea how I'm going to make it through today though, which is incredibly sad.

Stephanie and I finally got a chance to go to Vegas together this weekend. Nothing too wild, some site seeing, some gambling, some great food, some good times. Unfortunately she wasn't able to get a full week off work to come to Atlantis with us. So yesterday afternoon she took off to head back to Tucson while I went to the airport a bit earlier in the day than I should have. My flight didn't leave until midnight (Vegas time), and I only managed interrupted sleep throughout throughout the flight. I was exhausted going into it though, and fell asleep almost right away. The three hour layover in Atlanta seemed so tempting to try to grab a bit of shut eye, but I don't trust myself to wake up if I manage to dose off.

So I'm trying to hold off my first cup of coffee until I get to Nassau, in the hopes that the delayed caffeine rush will be good enough to get me through the better part of the day. I really don't want to wind up passing out halfway through the day.

Anyhow, Dave's already there, and says the Cove is the sickest thing he's ever seen. I'm pretty excited to spend a week relaxing in paradise. I have no idea if I'll even be playing poker there, but I'm sure whatever I wind up doing will be amazing.

I'm excited.

I spent last week in chicago, with the weather getting as low as 29 below. Today I'm in Tucson, where the temperatue was as high as 65. How the hell is someone supposed to pack for this sort of trip? 

Anyways, I flew out here Sunday morning (yesterday). About halfway through the flight we started hitting turbulence. So I'm there, trying to ignore the plane shaking back and forth, trying not to think about it falling out of the sky, when the pilot gets on his mic and says in a very serious voice

"Uhhmmm... Folks, we've got some bad news."

At this point, my hands start sweating, my heart goes into overdrive, and I start mentally writing out my last will and testament, hoping someone somewhere will telepathically hear it and know what I'd want. I mean, the concept of 'bad news' during a flight, especially when the planes being thrown around by high winds, is enough to worry the most steel-hearted of men. And I hate flying. So while I brace myself for what I expect to be his best estimate on the amount of time we have left to live, I look around me and see faces paler than mine in a snowstorm. After a few seconds he gets back on the air and informs us that

"The bears are down 14-10"

If I ever meet this pilot, I swear I'll kill him.
 

I finished up my first semester of graduate school on Tuesday. I can't express how relieved I feel like now. Just a month ago I was sitting around worrying about how much work I was gonna have to do before this week. I knew I'd be able to get it, but I thought i'd wind up going crazy over it. Fortunately it wasn't *that* awful.

I've already gotten my grade for physio back - I got an A-. Of course, at the start of the semester, when I was looking at this as the hardest class I've ever taken I would have been ecstatic to know I'd get a grade this good. But now I just wish i had gotten a solid A. Oh well. 

Lots of the second and third years we've talked to have really tried to quell a lot of the fears we have about grad school. One of the mantras they keep repeating is 'the first semester is the hardest'. i mean, i certainly couldn't manage another 4 years just like this. But if they're right, and this is as bad as it gets... well, I could probably do that.

Either way, no more grad school for 4 weeks. I leave for chicago tonight. 

Of course, todays going to suck. I still have to finish packing up all of my stuff (though I'm nearly done) and moving to the new apartment. I wanna be done by like two or three so I can get to the airport on time. This parts gonna suck too, given that there's a snowstorm in chicago, and we're supposed to get hit by one here today too. Hopefully after I leave.

in other news, I've been spending much of my free time this week playing with www.videojug.com/. this site is so much fun. their slogan is 'life explained on film'. They basically just make these five minute videos explaining anything from how to fold a shirt in two seconds to how to speak geek to how to tie a full windsor knot and how to enjoy the trapped arm whilst cuddling in bed.

basically there's like a million videos for like a million different activities. anything from 'how to' to 'what is'. very entertaining. Obviously everything needs to be taken with a grain of salt here, but lots of the 'how to do xyz' that i've watched so far (including videos on things I already know) have actually been spot on. I highly reccomend playing around with this site.

In the meantime. I'm going to try to finish up this cup of coffee and then get to work on the day. I've gotta finish this stuff up sooner as opposed to later. not fun. I wish I had more boxes. : (

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/middle_east/7782422.stm

I like his comment of "who cares if he threw a shoe at me". For as much as i can't stand him, I have to admire the way he publicly handled this, just joking about the situation and pointing out the most important thing, that the guy brought attention to whatever it was he was after.

amusing.

I really need to get up. I have a ton of work to do today. I didn't get anywhere near as much done last night as I had hoped. I made it through exactly 1 article, and one title of a second article. i'm pathetic.

I mean, I'll get it done, I always do. I'll probably just drive myself crazy finishing everything up at this point. I really wish we just had more instructions on this paper for experimental design. This is what scares me the most. I'm just going to go to the library in an hour or so (or whenever I finally manage to get out of bed, make coffee, take a shower, and get dressed. I mean, it doesn't sound like that much to do, but i'm miserably exhausted now). 

Thanksgiving this year was great. I went to NY with Stephanie and we celebrated it with a bunch of her old friends from high school. We spent non-eating time just walking around manhattan, which was really a blast. Nobu was, unsurprisingly, the best meal of my leaf. We went to a candy store on friday called Dylans, and  David Becham was shopping in there too. Apparantly I was standing right next to him in line, and didn't even notice. I lose. I gues I could keep going on with a whole bunch of random stuff about the trip, but that seems like it's enough. It was great, that's all.

I booked all my flights for winter break. chicago till the 28th, tucson till the 1st, vegas till the 5th, atlantis till the 11th, and LA till the 16th. Pokerstars is paying for all my travel expenses too. Which is good since i've been getting murdered on there the last few weeks. 

hope you all had a great turkey weekend.

~Dustin

http://www.foxnews.com/wires/2008Nov25/0,4670,QualifiedTeachers,00.html

Basically, it's an article talking about the insanely high rate (as high as 2 in 5) of high school teachers who aren't qualified to teach their subjects. It mostly looks at math teachers, and explains how so many of them - especially in poorer school districts -  don't have a degree in the subject their teacher or in education. That's ridiculous.

I've said it before, our teachers from K-12 should be one of the most highly paid, and highly competitive professions. For a high school algebra teacher to be only one chapter ahead of the students, and to barely have the ability to teach the class, is absurd. Imagine an elementary school math teacher who could barely grasp and teach the concept of "2 +2 =4". Who would want their kid to have a math teacher who struggled with that? 

Why is it that no one would be ok with a teacher who couldn't grasp basic addition, but there's an acceptance of sorts for teachers who can't gasp more challenging things? They're teachers, their job is to teach. Their purpose in life is to make sure that their students understand this stuff. And that's a really important job. It's not one that should be worth 30k a year, and it's not one that should be glossed over so kids have teachers who only know as much as they need to get by.

I firmly believe that everyone should be outraged by this. Imagine where you would all be if you had teachers who couldn't teach basic material. And then imagine where you would be if you had better teachers. No one I know would be where they are today if their teachers had been different. For better or worse, they play a huge role in our lives. And if that role is one of ignorance and uselessness, the impact it can and will be detrimental to a students life.

We, as a country, need to demand better education. Because there's a countless number of otherwise bright and talented kids who get an education worthy of a third-world classroom, all because their teachers were idiots.

Imagine if Obama had gone to school in classrooms like these. We'd all be screwed.

But it typical Dustin fashion, the end of the semester rolls around and I find myself looking for any excuse I can to avoid having to spend hours on end glued to books and term papers. I've managed to do this dishes today and clean my office.

that's not to say i've been without any forward progress on my work. I've finally finished my final paper for physiology, and I've spent some time scouring PsychInfo looking for some good articles for my theories class. But alas, while I should be doing work, I've been unable to get myself to do more than open up the PI interface, or simply read over my notes from class, for more than 5 minutes or so over the last few hours. I'd like to go out tonight too, but I do feel that if I stay here then at least at *some* point I"ll wind up convincing myself that working is +EV.

These two papers are due Monday and Friday respectively, and then I've just got my proposal for experimental design, and I've got to find a child somewhere to test with the WISC. And then there's take home exams for three of my classes. Nothing in there that's unmanageable, as long as I find a way to mangage my time well.

A few other things though, apart from school. I'm really looking forward thanksgiving this year. Stephanie and I are going to New York to visit some of her friends for the holiday. We dont' really have an actual 'anniversary', so we've just decided it's at the end of the month. We're going to Nobu friday night to celebrate. Sadly she has to go back to AZ on Saturday, but that's probably a good thing for me anyways, since it means I'll have a good portion of that Saturday and all of Sunday to work.

And then my first semester of grad school ends on the 16th. I'll be going to Chicago for a little over a week, though I haven't decided yet what day I'll be leaving Hartford. The plan is to stay there until the 28th, then go to Tucson to spend New Years with Steph, and then a few of us are going to go to vegas until the 5th.

The highlight of the break though is going to be Atlantis. Dave, Doug, Darren and I are all going to Paradise Island for a week for PCA. Since Dougs going to hit supernova elite this year, pokerstars is paying for his trip, including his buy in, and more importantly his room. He's not sure yet what kind of place he's going to get, but if what we've heard about what stars did in monte carlo and vegas this year, we've got good reason to expect them to be spending a lot on him (read: us).

Ok, now that I've procastinated enough, i'm going to try to get back to personality theories. My only goal this weekend is to get a few pages of this done. Good luck me.

~Dustin

In the wake of the election I've decided to return to livejournal. In that I won't be too lazy to update it for once.

To begin with, I've never been happier to be an American than I was last night watching Obama. Perhaps it's knowing that the Bush is one his way out, perhaps it's knowing that Sarah Palin isn't a heartbeat away from the presidency, or perhaps it's really that I believe the Obama 'message of change' is a real and viable thing.

I'd like to believe that it is. I'd like to beleive that he's seriously going to change our country around, put us on the right track, and make the world a god place again. But never before has a President (elect) been asked of so much. To be fair, he's being asked of things he's saying he'll do. But here's a man who's going to be expected to fix the economy, fix the war, fix gas, fix energy, fix the public school system, find Bin Laden,  all while trying to correct the tax system, perhaps even trying to save the social security system. I mean, the list goes on and on. It seems to me like the majority of what Obama is being expected to do is to clean up the mess our last two presidents have gotten us into.

Personally, after the economy takes a more stable shift, and after we make some progress witht he war, I'd love to see Obama tackle the public school system. Of course, we're looking at a a man who went to private universities like Occidental and Harvard law, but he was in the public school system through high school. After the problems these schools have faced over the last 10 or so years, having a prsient who didn't go to a private high school, and who (i hope) recognizes the important of the public education system, seems like the best solution.



This video makes me happy, but confuses the hell out of me. nominating Palin was the single dumbest, and most insulting, thing the Republican party could have done. Obama saw weaknesses in his platform, and decided to address those weaknesses with a running mate who had experience where he struggled. McCain thought he could sway the American public with the biggest shil ever. I was always amazed at how more people weren't becoming outraged that a man running for President was essentially saying "i think you're all so dumb that this might work".

Now, while I disagree with Palin on just about every ground, ranging from abortion rights, to shooting wolves from low flying planes, to the use of executive power, to the age of the world, she wasn't the one who decided she was the best possible vice presidential candidate. That was the McCain campaign, and they have no one to blame for this horrendus decision but themselves. While Republican infighting is probably always a good thing, I *almost* feel bad for the way Palin's being thrown under the bus. 

That being said, she could have ignored her own personal ambitions here and rejected the nomination when McCain first called her. And now it looks like she's going to pay for allowing the Republicans to bring her along - every dumb thing she's ever said, from not knowing that Africa was a continent as well as a country, to comments about Russia's proximaty to Alaska, are going to become public knowledge. I didn't really think it would be posible for her to look like a bigger idiot, but after watching this video it seems like the best is yet to come.

Just imagine what could have happened if the McCain had nominated a real candidate, instead of a showgirl.


Lastly, while i'm exctatic about American, I've never been more dissapointed in California. And for those of you who have known me for a few years, this says a lot. I don't even know where to begin with my disguest as proposition 8. Here we are, electing the countries first black president, and Caliornians say "well, if we can't be better than blacks, we at least have to be better than gays".

Ironically, the group in the exit polls who voted most strongly in favor of proposition 8 was the black vote, at 70%. The black women vote reached 75%. In fact, the only group polled who voted more strongly in favor of 8 than these two were those who identified themselves as 'republicans', voting overwhelmingly in favor of teh ballot. Because, of course, this makes all the sense in the world. A group goes from slavery to the white house and now decides it's time to deny rights to another group. Of course, the African American vote accounted for 10%. it's still just amazing that this group as a whole could have this mentality.

Looking at the breakdown of the votes, some expected trends pop up. People with a college degree voted more strongly against 8, while people without voted more strongly for it. And of course, the more college someone reported (some high school, high school degree, some college, college degree, post graduate), the more often the voted against the measure. Indicating that education helps erase some degree of prejudice. Also not surprising is the age breakdown. Up to until about 30, voters were strongly against the ballot, but as age increased, so did the liklihood that someone would vote for the measure, indicating a trend towards conservativism in a staunchly liberal state.

It's frustrating to see that people are so insistant on denying rights to other groups. There's always been a trend in this country for one group to be superior to another. Whether we're discriminating on the basis of your race, your heritage, your religion, your sexuality, there's always something.

But these ignorant bigots still get to vote, and still insist that they deserve more rights than people who are different from them.

I'd like to imagine that eventually, we'll live in a country where people are discriminated, but there's always going to be a large group of people who insist that some other group shouldn't be allowed to have what they have. It's the human way.

But at least there were enough people in this country who could put these views aside to elect the better candidate for the presidency.
 

Psy.D

So I got to Hartford at the end of August. I'm still in the process of getting my life set up here though. I just got my car on Friday, and I just got all the stuff we shipped from LA yesterday (minus the TV, which UPS insists they can't ship). So now that I finally have more than just a laptop, some clothes, and a toothbrush, I can start organizing my life in this state.

So far I'm enjoying most of my classes. Experimental Design will likely be the biggest challenge throughout the year (it's the only two semester course this year), but both Physio and Psych Assessment seem interesting so far - PA even seems like it could be fun. It's all about testing, something that the students in the program who have done it before say is really enjoyable.

Speaking of my classmates, so far so good. It's pretty cool to be with a group of people who are all really focused on the same stuff, and all going through it at the same time. A lot of us have the same fears about the program, which is actually really reassuring. We all have different directions we want to go within Psychology, so it'll be interesting to see how that lends itself to the program over the next few years.

So far the only bad thing is my practicum. And I say 'bad' as a very loose term here. I was expecting both more responsibilities and more clinical work from the practicum, and while we've only met once (and will again today in about an hour), it seems as though the work I'll be doing there is meant to both limited and excessively easy. I'll just be working with scripted programs for elderly clients, primarily in assisted living programs working with clients with Alzheimer's or Dementia. The upside to all this is that I'll have a better working understand of both Alzheimer's and the treatment for it. But since the program is scripted from start to finish, there's a very low ceiling on the amount I can really get out of the program. 
But, I've only had one day so far, so maybe my perception of the place is wrong. We'll see

Life

Stephanie came out last weekend for a very brief visit. She went to Atlanta for an SPJ conference, and then came up to NY and then to Hartford since she was on this side of the country. It was great to get a chance to see her already and show her around the little bit of Hartford that I know. Sadly we don't know yet when the next time is that we'll be able to see each other. Since some of my classes have flexible schedules ( I can go to a class on Wednesday instead of Monday for example) I'm going to start looking for a weekend when I can get out to Tucson for a few days. 

I played a bit of poker the first week I was here, and had my best cash week ever. By far. I absolutely killed the tables. I've had a few bad days since then, and i've only played once so far this week (got killed). Now that I have my second moniter though I'm going to get another session going today after work.

Anyhow, I haven't updated this thing in a month, so I thought I'd get another note in.

~Dustin

Hartford

So everything with Hartford is slowly starting to fall into place. I finally got my confirmation from them about housing. I'll be living with Ron Chance, one of the other first year students in the program. The two of us will be sharing a 4-bedroom townhouse, so we each get a private bedroom and a private office. It seems as though we have to share a bathroom, which seems strange for a 4-bedroom place, but whatever. It's cheaper, larger and comes with more amenities than any other place I could find in Hartford, so at least until I know the town better, this really seems like the best place to live. Plus, it's on Asylum Avenue. How can I possibly pass up living on Asylum Avenue when I'm going to a Psych school?

I met with my adviser last week when he came to Long Beach to take his daughter to college. We sorted out my schedule for the first semester.

Monday:
2:00 - 4:30 - Physiological Psychology

Tuesday:
No class

Wednesday:
8:30 - 11:00 - Psychological Assessment 1
2:00 - 4:30 - Experimental Design

Thursday:
No class

Friday:
8:30 - 11:00 - Theories of Personality
11:20 - 1:00 -  Psychological Assessment 1 lab

I also have my pre-practicum at the New England Cognitive Center, which will last for at least the entire semester. I will be there for 8-10 hours a week (hence the no classes on Tuesday and Thursday), and will also include a meeting once a week with a licensed clinician to discuss my work in the program, and a once a week class (but there's no set dates or times for that yet, i assume it just means I'll be meeting with a professor about it). And of course, a number of readings to go along with it.

So essentially, I'm taking 6 classes with the pre-practicum. Unfortunately, being a first year student, I had very little choices in my classes and schedule, which is why I have two separate 8:30am classes. But it's only a semester, and ideally later on I'll be able to avoid having to be in class quite that early. At least I live close to campus.

Orientation starts on the 29th, so I'm shooting for arriving in Hartford around the 22nd, which would give me a good week to learn a little about the town, buy some stuff for my new place, and hopefully meet some new people.

Stephanie

We've had a lot of ups and downs this summer. Last week was really tough in particular. I'll avoid the details, since they're messy and I'm not even sure that either of us understands them all. Long story short though, she spent all of Saturday on standby trying to fly out here to apologize for everything that went wrong from her side. It was something that meant a lot to me, and really showed me how much she cares about me and this relationship. In the end what matters is that the good times are more important to me than the bad ones. I love this girl. She's smart, goofy, pretty, really into sports, fun to be around, and has really helped me a lot through the last year and a half. She's really amazing.

It sucks that we have problems, because when things are good (which is still like 95% of the time), I feel like my life is great. I feel like I'm happier with her than I ever have been before. But when things aren't good, I just feel like my life is miserable. We're both scared about what might happen when I leave for Hartford, and she's still got a year left in college. But the only thing we can honestly say is 'there's no point in being scared about what might happen, especially when you're happy with what's happening now'. We both want to be realistic about how much of a challenge Hartford will be, and we know that it's going to be a strain on our relationship. But as long as we're both happy, we're going to keep trying.

Even though we don't really fight much, when we do fight it becomes bad. I think in the 9 months we've 'officially' been dating, we've gotten into 4 serious arguments. And obviously I want to say 'well, it's normal for couples to fight about stuff', but each time it's happened I've been so miserable while it's been going on that it doesn't feel normal. We spent a long time Saturday night talking about the problems we have, and trying to figure out the mistakes we've been made. We brought a lot of stuff out into the open, and really talked about our need to communicate better, since the last two big fights we've had have stemmed completely from bad communication.

Poker

So I didn't do well at all this summer in the world series. I couldn't last more than a few hours in any tourney, but I'd honestly rather bust 6 hours into the main event than 3 days into it and bust a few hours before hitting the money. I mean, at least in the later way you have a solid chance, but it'd be far more frustrating to get that close to having some sort of return on your investment and then bust. For a few weeks following the main event I just ran like shit everywhere I played. I couldn't cash in a tourney, I couldn't win in ring games, I'd get outdrawn, then make mistakes, miss my draws, lose with aces, lose with sets, lose vs. draws, and just generally started really hating poker.

Two Sundays ago I final tabled a $50 tourney, then last week I ran and played well and had my single best ever week in cash games, along with my single best ever day in cash games. I then final tabled the $50r this sunday to double my weeks winnings, making it my second best week ever (only beaten by the week I final tabled the $215). So I'd say for now it looks like I'm back on track in poker. It feels good to have a few decent scores recently, since I don't know how much I'm going to be playing once I get to Hartford.

Given how well last week went I decided to buy myself a new laptop. After a lot of debate I settled on the MacBook. The Air looked spiffy, but it's nothing more than expensive eye candy. The MacBook Pro just had a bunch of stuff I neither need nor want, since I'm really just looking for something with a good battery life that I can take to class for notes, and ideally play some a table or two while sitting on a couch. I thought a lot about getting another windows-based laptop, and I guess the only reason I really settled on the mac was I wanted to try something new. Plus everyone I know who has a mac loves it. We'll see how it goes I guess.

Friends

I feel like most of my friends in Redondo are either gone. I've done an awful job of keeping in touch with people since graduation. It sucks that I've lost touch with so many people, because now I feel so awkward about calling someone up who I haven't seen in years and saying "hey, lets hang out!". On top of that, the people I have kept in touch with are - for the most part - either not here any more, or working so often that we can barely ever hang out. I guess that's just what college does though. I wish I had kept in touch with everyone, but that's just not really feasibly possible. All the BBYO friends, all the RUHS friends, it's just so hard to stay in contact with everyone.

So to make up for it, I spent a lot of time this summer going places to visit people. Obviously Tucson was at the top of the list of places I wanted to go. But then there was Vegas. I spent some of my time out there with people from Redlands, but then there were friends from Redondo who had moved there who I wanted to spend time with, and friends from Chicago who were all going out there for a weekend that I went to visit. Then there was San Diego, and of course Chicago. I guess having to get on a plane or drive for 2 or 3 hours is a long way to go to hang out with people, but c'est la vie.

Olympics

I'm looking forward to these Olympics so much less than I have in previous years. Part of the reason is that, while I certainly don't support a lot of Chinas policies, I'm really not going to want to see and hear all of the controversy surrounding the events. All the people who are going to be making these anti-China demonstrations, all the athletes who are going to make some sort of statement during the games, all the commentary on Chinas policies, pollution, history, etc. The Olympics are just supposed to be an opportunity for sports, and I think the Olympic comity could have picked far better places Beijing for these games.

 And of course there's my usual summer Olympics complaint - NBC doesn't like fencing. The one sport I'd really really want to watch is only going to be shown during '24-hour multiple sports coverage' according to nbcolympics.com. I mean, sure, people love watching swimming and gymnastics. but come on, don't tell me that the mens sabre finals are going to be shown from 2am-9am along with women's wrestling finals, womens table tennis, US vs. Netherlands softball, and US vs. New Zealand women's basketball. Don't force me to sift through all of that in the wee hours of the morning to see the one thing I really want to watch during the Olympics. And of course, if if i want to watch the mens sabre gold medal match, I have to watch online.

At least most of the events will be online, but come on... show the world some sword fighting, don't put it on at the worst time with all the other sports that no one wants to see.  Sure, other than rooting for an American gold, I don't really care who wins. But that's just because I enjoy watching the sport, and wish I could actually see it on TV. I mean, sword fighting has to be more exciting to watch on TV than cycling or canoeing, right? NBC doesn't agree.

I'm chilling in vegas right now, staying with a few poker buddies who rented a sick place just off the strip. There's something nice about waking up, going for a swim in a heated pool in the shade while it's 100+ outside.

Vegas is sick. this is my third trip here this summer. I came out a few days before the main event so I could visit some people in town before the tournament starts up. I'm staying at the house until tomorrow when my place at the palms will be ready. As much as I've never been a great lover of food, I've honestly had three of the best meals of my life on each oft he last three trips.
Last night we went to Nobu, and wow. We got the new style kobe sashimi. hands down, without question, the singlest best thing I've ever tasted in my life. and not just me - all four of us were floored, and 2 of these guys consider life 'a series of moments in between great meals'. In close second to that would have to be the hot rock plates at Stack.

These last three trips have really been the best ones I've taken. I haven't even played that much poker here, but I've just been going out and having a blast. I played in my first WSOP event - a $1500 one towards the start of june, but didn't do well in it. I've moved back up to higher cash games online, and have split a few legitimate high limit games with some of the guys in the house.

Things with Stephanie hit a rocky point while she was in Argetina, but we've since talked and worked a lot of things out. Obviously every relationsihp has problems, and obviously being this far from each other - and knowing that I'll be moving to connecticut in a few months is making things even more of a challenge. But the few tough spots are more than worth it for everything good. she's trying to get an opportunity to come out to vegas for part of this trip (i'm here 'till the 10th), and then afterwards I'm going to head back up to Tucson for a good part of the month.

Heading down to the strip in a bit to pay for my entry to the main event, then register with stars at the palms. Vegas is too much fun.

So after 5 years I've finally left Redlands. It's been fun, but now it's time for me to move on to the next part of my life. Or at least, to have as much fun as possible before I move leave for Hartford. I still have no idea where I'm going to live when I get there - I need to start looking at apartments and searching for room mates. But I'll worry about that when I've got nothing to do.

I leave for Chicago in a few hours. My cousin is getting married this weekend, so I'm going out for that. I'll be there until Wednesday. Presumably I'll spend my time visiting my family and the few friends I have who still live in the area.

Next Thursday I'll be going to Vegas for a few days. We've got a room at the Wynn the first night, and then we're moving over to the Rio for a few days. I'm not really a fan of the Rio at all, but since all the WSOP events are being held there I figured I should stay there for the first event I'll be  playing. It's a $1500 buy in, and I'm entering it using my FPP's from Pokerstars (i.e., it's free for me). This is actually the smallest event at the WSOP,  but it's still going to be the biggest tournament I've ever played in, both in terms of buy in, prize pool, and first place money. Last year this event had 3,000 people, a $4.5m prize pool, with $727k for first. Presumably this year should be even larger.

Even though I'll be coming back to LA after that event, I'll be going out for a least one more trip in June. Since I won a second seat to the main event I have $10,000 to spend on tournament entries. I'm not sure yet which events I'm going to want to play, but I figure I"ll enter at least two more, probably both $2,000 or $2,500 events, and then just keep the rest of that $10k. I just don't know yet what days I'll be going. Of course, I'll also be back there on July 2nd for the main event.

I played the 30 rebuy to the main event again today and won it for the second time. Since I already have a seat I basically get $12,500 for the win (2nd place paid $215 btw, this is more or less winner take all). ship.

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/04/22/ogc_logo/

In April last year, London design outfit FHD proudly announced it would be rebranding the UK's Office of Government Commerce (OGC)...

So far so good - nothing more exciting than some traditional Strategy Boutique Newspeak. However, the wheels came off this particular rebrand in spectacular style when the new logo was presented to OGC staff.

According to an inside source, the graphic had allegedly already been inscribed onto mousemats and pens in anticipation of its imminent deployment, but it took OGC foot soldiers around 20 seconds to realise why this particular bit of joss-stick-driven madness was going to end in tears (of laughter):

On dear, oh dear.* Well, at least it appears that FHD really does have expertise "in workings of government", as a quick 90 clockwise rotation reveals.

Quite remarkably, our informant suggested that, having spent the cash, OGC intends to roll out the logo anyway. Well, we contacted the OGC for comment, and a spokesman gamely explained: "The OGC is currently overhauling the design of its corporate materials following a new strategy and forward direction. As part of this, the OGC has been developing a new visual identity, one aspect of which is a new logo.

"The proposed version, which you have sent over, has been shared with staff, and is now going through final technical stages. It is true that it caused a few titters among some staff when viewed on its side, but on consideration we concluded that the effect was generic to the particular combination of the letters 'OGC' - and is not inappropriate to an organisation that's looking to have a firm grip on government spend!"

He concluded: "The new identity has been extremely well received, as it presents a very clean, uncluttered and modern identity."

The mind boggles. For the record, and in case you'd like to get your hands on a rebranded OGC mousemat, we gather staff have stripped the building of every example not nailed down, so check eBay later this week for your five-knuckle shuffle collectable. ®

I've been in Redondo since thursday. Stephanie came out last weekend for passover, and I decided to just stay here afterwards since I'm going to St. Louis today for some random third cousins wedding. I go back to Redlands on Tuesday.

I gotta say, I'm looking forward to going back. Everyone I've tried to get in touch with since getting back to Redondo either A: Doesn't answer their phone/return calls, B: works all day and night, or C: doesn't live here any more. It's actually really rather boring. I'm really looking forward to going back to Redlands on tuesday. Of course, it doesn't help that poker hasn't been that great here.

Seeing Steph this weekend was great. Went to a nice restaraunt, went down to the beach one day, went for a bike ride up to marina del ray one day. My mom was excited that my girlfriend was here for passover. Actually I think she was mostly excited that I invited anyone for passover, but I know she really likes Steph. It was a really good trip. I'm gonna be sad when she leaves in may for Argentina for 6 weeks. She was telling me how if the trip was in the winter (since it'd be summer there) they'd be able to take a weekend trip to Antarctica. That single thing would have been the final selling point in getting me to take the 10 hour flight down there to visit her this summer. As it is, I'm half tempted to go if Vegas starts of poorly. But of course, the longer I wait, the more expensive it'd be to get down there. I guess at this point all I can do is wait until June, see how pokers going, and then decide.

Poker is, as I mentioned, not going well over the last few days. My stocks, on the other hand, took off quite a bit. Google had a big day monday and brought me out of the hole that markets downswing put me in on the year. I chose what turned out to be a pretty good time to buy it. So i'm selling some of it off to diversify a little more.

I started taking some medication for Tourette's again. About 2 months ago all the stress from grad school stuff finally caught up to me and I started to tic again. It's the first time in 3+ years I've had to take meds. At this point, the symptoms have gone away again, but I'm still on the meds for a bit just in case.

I haven't been sleeping well lately. I don't know if it's the bed at my moms place or a side effect of the Catapress. I should be able to find when I get back to Redlands, where I have a bed I know I can sleep in. Very frustrating.

That of course, is why I'm up at 7:33am. There should be laws against being awake at this hour, but sadly here I am. And I've been up for a while.

I guess that just mean I can get an early start to my day. If only I had anything to do today, that might be a good thing.

Poker stars let me know that they've booked my suite for the WSOP.  This place looks pretty cool. I'd never pay for something like this on a vegas trip, but only 'cuz it runs waaaaaaaaay more than I feel like shelling out for a place that, in theory, is just to sleep.

http://www.palmsplace.com/accommodations/studio.php


Can't wait for vegas this summer.  

also,  Oceans 13 is surprisingly amazing. Not amazing as in amazing-as-far-as-sequals-go. But actually as good as Oceans 11, one of my top 10 all time favorite movies. I highly reccomend it     

Alex sent me this, and I thought it was too good to pass up posting on here.

So we presented our paper at the Western Psychology Association (WPA) conference yesterday. Jessica couldn't come, but Susan and I decided it would be a good idea to bring our coders, Adrian and Kelly. So the 4 of us met in Irvine yesterday around noon, had lunch, walked around and saw some of the stuff being presented, and then set up our poster presentation for 4:00.
The whole thing was very cool. I got to talk to a bunch of people about their research, and then got to explain my own research to those who were interested in it.
The current working title of our paper is 'A content analysis of disability-related material in introductory psychology textbooks', which was one of the least interesting sounding subjects at the conference. Still, we've managed to generate some serious interest amongst not only textbook publishers and professors, but with graduate and undergraduate students.

A number of people had a lot of the same questions,  such as the concept of people first speech. That includes the phrase 'child with autism' being used rather 'autistic child'. Susan basically just stood back and let me take care of our presentation, only coming in to answer a questions when i had to redirect something to her that I wasn't sure about.

The whole experience was very cool. I'm actually looking forward to doing this once I'm a graduate student.

In the meantime, I'm in Redondo for a day or two for my moms birthday.

So having decided that the Aeron chair is only marginabley more comfortable than a bed of nails (though it seems, only for me... everyone else who's sat in one of these things loves them), I'm going to be getting rid of it. I'm not happy about this, since I had gotten excited about the idea of actually being able to sit at my desk without getting a backache. Not to mention the fact that I was getting arguably the best chair on the market for roughly half the retail price.

boo.

First of all, I recently bought an Aeron chair.


The chair is supposed to be the absolute best chair on the market in terms of how comfortable it is to sit in. That isn't to say that it's like sitting down on a nice squishy sofa, but rather that you can stay in the chair without getting uncomfortable for extended periods of time. It's an ergonomic chair designed for people who spend a significant portion of their life at a desk. It's supposed to get rid of the common lower back and shoulder blade pains most people get from spending a few hours in a typical office chair. Unfortunately, I seem to be the one person anywhere (and I've searched online for reviews) who has anything bad to say about this chair. It has a million knobs and levers on it to adjust everything from the tension in of the material, to how much force you need to apply to tilt the chair back. I've been e-mailing them recently asking them what I need to do to make this thing comfortable for me, but so far we haven't found anything that works.

I probably shouldn't complain, since I did buy it off eBay. But then again, Dave bought one too and his works fine. The good news is we found it for significantly cheaper (we bought 3 used ones via a buy it now option, and each one was less than half the price of a new chair from a HM dealer), so if I don't keep it I can just resell it on eBay for the standard going price and make a bit of a profit. That said, I really want a comfortable chair.

Secondly, the city has been doing construction on our street for a month now. Not only does this mean that I have to drive out of my way every time I'm going from or coming to my house, but this morning they shut off all the water on our street. Normally I wouldn't have cared so much, but they shut it off as I was stepping into the shower. Literally, I had just stepped in, and maybe 10 seconds later it just dies. : ( I hadn't even brushed my teeth yet. My neighbor was outside when i went to see if i could find out what was wrong, and told me that they had been informed of the water being shut off until 4 today. So now I get to go to my last day at Patton minus both a shower and clean teeth.

I gotta say, I love these mornings when i go to the hospital only to turn right around as soon as I get there. Paula wasn't answering her phone this morning, and since I don't have a key to the gate I have to be escorted in by Paula when I get there.
I've been working at Patton since June, and I'm at the point where - as a volunteer - there's little more that I can do there. Most days I wind up sitting in some room watching as someone works with patients. When I'm with Paula I wind up walking around and helping them with whatever project they're working on. The last few times I've worked with her I"ve helped this insanely rude and obnoxious patient try to learn how to add and subtract fractions. This isn't because it's a skill he really needs to learn, but it's because he's convinced that if he can use fractions properly he'll get paid for it. And no matter how often anyone tells him otherwise, he insists it's going to happen. So I help (or at least try to help) him learn how to add 3 1/2 to 2 1/2. You'd be amazed how long that can take.

That being said, this is my last week at the hospital. After this it's just... well, whatever I want to do I guess. Stephanie comes out 4/18-4/20 for passover. I'm going to St. Louis 4/24-4/28 for my second cousins wedding, and then Chicago 5/21-5/28 for another cousins wedding. I think Marshal and Ali's wedding is some point in June, but I can't remember off the top of my head. Unfortunately all this means that I won't be able to go to Hawaii like I had originally planned to. Maybe some point later in the summer (post-Vegas) I'll be able to get out to Oahu and visit Eric.

I finally mailed my official acceptance to Hartford. Hopefully I'll hear back from them sometime soon with information on housing, and maybe some of the other important stuff like when I have to be there. That's probably a useful thing to know.

I won a seat to the main event at the WSOP today.

I took down a $30 rebuy tourney in just under 4 hours to win the package.

That includes the $10,000 entry fee for the tournement. another $2500 to do whatever with, and 8 nights in a suite at the Palms.

All I have to say is it's about fucking time I won one of these. I've come incredibly close 4 times before this, so finally taking this down is... well, nice.

Good times.
I got back from Tucson last night, been there since Wednesday. Had a great trip. Steph and I followed the Cubs around a bit, seeing them in Tucson, Peoria, and Mesa. Friday we saw them with Josh and wound up getting seats a few rows behind home plate, where my dad tells me we were on ESPN for every pitch for 3 hours. That was kinda neat. Just as cool however was the Cubs winning 2 of the games this weekend. Since my record outside of Wrigley before this weekend was roughly 1-10 it was nice to actually see my team win.
Saturday we went to the Renaissance fair. Steph had never been before and knew that I'm a fan of that sort of thing. As always the fair was a blast.
The whole trip was a good time, but sad since we're not going to be able to see much of each other for a bit. She's got a lot of work to do before the end of the semester, and it looks like the best we can hope for at the moment is for her to make it out here for Passover. After that, there'll be the day or two before she heads to Buenos Aires for 6 weeks. But, c'est la vie.

In the meantime, I'm trying to convince a few friends to go to Vegas with me this weekend. I'm also hoping that this on and off again stomach ache that I've had since yesterday will go away soon.

I finally finished reading Thief of Time by Terry Prachet. I had heard his name for years, and I only just recently picked up one of his books. I gotta say, reading it through I didn't like it at all. I was confused, had no idea what was going on at times, and couldn't follow his somewhat erratic story line to save my life. Having finished it now, it all makes sense, and I've started reading it again and seeing how that everything that didn't make sense the first time to was clearly designed to make much more sense once you can see where he's going. Very ingenious.

I got rejected from Rutgers. I'm a little disappointed by this, but I knew I bombed my interview there. But at least I got into my second choice school (and to be fair, it was my top choice before I actually went and visited Rutgers). So now I know for sure that within a few months I'll be moving to Connecticut. I need to official accept the offer, and then presumably they'll start telling me things like... when I need to be there. My mom wants to come with me to look at houses out there sometime soon, but I don't have the slightest idea when would be the best time to do that.

I have to reschedule my trip to Hawaii at the end of April, since I forgot that I promised my mom like 6 months ago that I'd go with her to some wedding out there. I think it's like my second cousin or something. That whole side of the family is weird, so I won't even try to figure out exactly how this girl is related to me. Still, the whole family will be there, so I'll get to see all of them. Of course, the trip does have a more negative turn, since my grandpa is in the hospital right now, and they've just diagnosed him with emphysema. : ( But it does give me a chance to see him relatively soon. So that's a plus

Pokers been up and down constantly. I still can't get anything going in tourneys. I keep running into aces in them. I busted the 162 3 times this week vs AA, and the 163 2 times vs AA. It's very difficult to do well in these things when you get big hands you can't get away from and your opponents get slightly bigger ones. Oh well. Cash games are going better at least. Heads up has been swingy, but ring games on full tilt have been great. I'm running like a man possessed on there.

This last week was my sisters one-year clean date. And while I, like her and everyone else, is very proud of her for staying clean this long.

I have another research meeting today. We're getting close to april 10th, when we'll be presenting our research at the Western Psychological Association (WPA) Conference. Very cool indeed. Of course, there's a lot of work to do between now and then, but we're making good progress. And seeing our results in a more empirical form, rather than just "well, it seems this way" is... well, once again just cool. Hopefully some changes will be made as a result of this study.

I had another personal trainer session yesterday. I'm doing them twice a week now, and mixing in at least a day/week to go in for just cardio. So far having someone who's going to get on my case if I'm not improving enough has been the motivation I need to get my ass in there and work out. Of course, there's hardly been a day in recent weeks that some part of my body hasn't been sore. By the time my arms get better from yesterdays session, I'll be going back in there again for another session. It's too bad PT is so expensive, otherwise I'd be tempted to just keep doing it twice a week indefinitely. Maybe if I can get my ass in gear on the poker tables I won't really care.

Dear Dustin,
Congratulations!
We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted into the Doctoral Program in Clinical Psychology at the University of Hartford's Graduate Institute of Professional Psychology

Even though I already knew I was in via the phone message I got last week, seeing it on an official letterhead from the school is amazing.

It doesn't look like I got into Rutgers, unless I've been waitlisted. I could be wrong of course, but oh well. Hartford was my second choice after Rutgers. Both Denver and Pacific were ok, each having things about their program that made it unique and good, but neither compared to either Hartford or Rutgers. I've also turned down an interview at Widener, figuring I don't want to make *another* trip to the east coast for a school that I know doesn't hold up as well as some of these other ones.

I'm trying to do as much stuff in the remaining few months as I can, figuring the following 5 years will be too intense to do much of the same. I'm going to Tucson to see Steph in a week or so, Hawaii at the end of April, Chicago at the end of May, and hopefully Vegas for a good portion of June for the WSOP.

Despite having an awful 15 straight losing days, I think I've managed to get back on track. Still can't get anything going in tourneys, but at least cash games have been treating me alright the past few days. However, I did lose half of my winnings for 2008 during that 15 day streak, and I've dropped down a bit in limits to lessen the stress of the game, meaning it will likely take longer to make it back. Of course, one decent tourney cash (or win hopefully) will put me back where I should be.

so I flew out to Denver Thursday night, since I had an interview with DU yesterday morning.
After I landed I saw I has a message, listen to it to hear,
"Hi Dustin, this is Lauren from the University of Hartford, Dr. Mehm has asked me to call you to inform you that you have been accepted into our doctoral program. We will send you a formal letter next week, but we wanted to let you know as soon as possible. Congratulations"

I can not begin to express what hearing that message felt like. At no point in my life have I ever experienced that kind of relief. Knowing that I will be going to graduate school - and to at the very least my second choice program... Wow. Ive been ecstatic all weekend. I'm still going out to Oregon next weekend for another interview, just becuse I want to make sure I'm making the most informed possible decision. But if I hear back from either Widener or UW about one I'm just going to turn them down.

I can't imagine that my trip to Pacific next weekend will be better than Hartford. But Rutgers was incredible. If I get accepted there I'll turn down Hartford. Otherwise, Ill be starting graduate school I'm the fall in Connecticut, and 5 years from now I'll officially be Dr. Siegel.

I got a letter from Rutgers today telling me that the "Clinical Psychology faculty has voted unanimously to invite you to come to Rutgers for a day of interviews, orientation, and information."

I'm not sure if the professors need to unanimously agree that a doctoral candidate is good enough for an interview, though I can't imagine they would be quite that selective. According to their website last year they had 556 applicants for 26 openings in the program, for roughly a 4.5% acceptance rate. Either way, i'm excited. My interview is schedule for monday, 2/25. I need to do some more research on the school and the faculty now to prepare myself for it.

Speaking of interviews, I went to Hartford this past weekend for my first one. I really liked the program. It's far more practitioner based than I had expected, placing much more emphasis on training psychologists rather than preparing us for a life of academia. The practicums start in the second year, meaning I could begin having clients as early as fall, 2009. What's more, it's not a 7 year program like most - most students complete the whole program in about 5 years.

The downside is a lack of published work by students there (hence the shorter completion time). The more you have published, the better your reputation, the better you opportunities to essentially do whatever the hell you want. Obviously there's still a dissertation, and there are chances to publish, either on your own or with professors. I read a few of their papers the last two weeks, and if I get accepted and chose to go there, I'd actually really like to work with Dr. Wahl studying stigma in the mental health population. He published papers on the subject before, most notably with regards to schizophrenia and bipolar disorder. But I'd really like to examine it from the perspective of less severe disorders - OCD, PTSD, ADHD, TS, etc.

In other news...
I'm going out to Tucson this weekend to see Stephanie for valentines day.
I final tabled the 163 on full tilt tonight (the same tournement as the 162 on stars, the one I keep bitching about how I can't win). I took 8th. I also took 12th in the stars one last the week. I keep getting so close and not being able to finish it off. At least this is going to pay for flights for the next few weekends. If only I didn't hate flying as much as I do.
The weekend after Rutgers I think i'm going to go to Vegas. My until-now unstated goal seems to be to have something to do every weekend. Whether it's going to visit Stephanie, going to interviews, going to LA, or going to Vegas, I've been enjoying myself a lot recently.

Susan, Jessica, and I submited our research paper to the Western Psychological Association (WPA), as they do a conference every year to present new psychology articles. We're going to be presenting our paper on thursday 4/10.


This means that not only do I get to present a paper at a psych conference, but I still get to go to my dads wedding, since I'll be presenting on the first day.

But I still can't win the fucking $150+12 on stars. I bubbled the final table a few weeks ago. Got there tonight. Was short stacked coming in, had the chip lead by the time we got 4 handed, then finally busted in 4th for $9k.
Seriously, my one goal is to win this fucking tournement. More than winning a bracelet in the WSOP. More than winning the sunday mil. It's a matter of pride at this point. This is either my 5th or 6th time final tabling this thing. I *should* have won it by now with those numbers. But no. I have to go and donk around with top pair heads up in the blinds vs the the guy who has me barely covered and bust in the biggest pot of the tourney. Bleh.


In other news, I got a call from the University of Hartford a few days ago. "We've reviewed your application and would like to offer you an interview to our program". Can't explain how excited I was to get that call. I'm flying out there on the 7th for an interview at 1:00 the next afternoon. They have, I believe, the highest acceptance rate of all the schools I'm applying to, at roughly 6 or 7%. And, most importantly, it's my top choice. Here's to hoping I do well there.

I finished the last of my graduate applications on Wednesday. Can't say how much weight that's lifted of my shoulders. All I have to do now is spend the next few weeks feeling nervous and wondering if I'm going to get an interview anywhere. Good luck me.

Chris, Rusty, and I are thinking about getting a dog. We went to a few places today, and tomorrow we're going to go to another pet adoption shelter in san bernardino.

I want to find a date to go out to Tucson again. it's been like 6 months since I've been there. At least steph was here for new years.

Went to vegas last weekend with dave, mike, my dad, and his fiance (tracie). I've recognized that I'm going to have a mother-in-law, but didn't realize until she said it that i'm going to have two brother-in-laws. Such a weird feeling. I've known the boys and tracie for like 10 years now, so it's not like it's 3 totally random people, but still... very strange.

5 applications down. 3 to go. and i'm almost done with the first of those 3. I just need to finish editing the essay for denver and I can send it in in a few days.

Stephanie came out last weekend. It was great getting to spend a few days together. She's coming out again for new years, though sadly only from the 30th-1st. talk about a short trip. I think I owe her like a dozen trips to Tucson after this. Hopefully once I send in my last application (Pacific, due 1/10) I'll start making more trips out there.

I saw the golden compass the other week. Talk about a let down. I mean, I expected it to be bad, but they completely castrated the idea of the book. It's worth seeing, just because they still show some of the entertaining aspects of the story, but it's really nothing great. Just read the book.

I also saw Charlie Wilsons War the other day. Now here's a good movie. I think as Americans we've known since 9/11 about USA's involvement in arming and training Afghanistan to fight Russian imperialism. But other than that statement, few of us know anything about how or why that happened. Charlie Wilsons War does a great job of explaining the way the cold war was ended via Afghanistan, and really engrosses you in what happens. I'd highly recommend the movie to everyone.

Dave, Mike, and I are going out to vegas from the 3rd to the 6th. My dad's going to be there, so it should be a lot of fun.

also, my foot is finally starting to look like it's healing properly. Hopefully I won't need any more cryosurgery, but who knows.

I guess I"ll start with Saturday.

First I get woken up by my neighbors barking dogs at like 7am.
go to the casino around 1. Find myself on the lower end of a set over set in a $1600 pot. opt to leave.
Walking to the valet, I slip and fall on a random wet spot on the tile, bruise my elbows a bit.
waiting for my car, some lady asks me to help her 400 lb father get into his car. there's 5 of us, holding either a limb or his back. finally we realize we can't get him into the car so try to help him back onto his wheel chair. He sneezes, and since his arms are being held, nothing stops him from sneezing all over me.
the guy holding his arms freaks out at this and kicks his wheel chair. the part his foot sits on slices open my left big toe.
so now i've got a bloody foot. i'm covered with snot. and lost in poker.
there is of course, traffic coming back from the casino. the usual 10 minute drive is now 45 minutes.
I opt to get some comfort food at KFC, but of course they give me the wrong order.

I was basically too scared to leave the house again. I told my mom about the day and she said I probably shouldn't get in a car again.

oish.

I sent in my first 4 applications last week - University of Washington, Washington Unversity, Fordham, and Hartford. Was feeling pretty good about that until I got an e-mail from Hartford saying they had never received one of my letters of recc. So now I'm waiting to hear back from Susan regarding the letter, hopefully she'll get my messages today and get me a new one in time. At least they said it wasn't going to affect my application. They've got a few hundred and it takes them a week or so even get everything sorted out so they can start reviewing them. Hopefully I can get that in to them today.

On the bright side, Stephanies coming out this weekend and staying until xmas. Then she's coming out again on new years. Other than that, the next two weeks are gonna be dull as hell. No ones in town, not even my room mates, so I don't really know what I"m gonna do with my time. Hopefully I can get my last 4 applications done this week so I can start enjoying life a bit sooner, but who knows.

 israeli YMCA? lol

G-d: And remember Moses, in the laws of keeping Kosher, never cook a calf in its mother's milk. It is cruel.
Moses: Ohhhhhh! So you are saying we should never eat milk and meat together.

G-d: No, what I'm saying is, never cook a calf in its mother's milk.
Moses: Oh, Lord forgive my ignorance! What you are really saying is we should wait six hours after eating meat to eat milk so the two are not in our stomachs.

G-d: No, Moses, what I'm saying is, never cook a calf in it's mother's milk!!!
Moses: Oh, Lord! Please don't strike me down for my stupidity! What you mean is we should have a separate set of dishes for milk and a separate set for meat and if we make a mistake we have to bury that dish outside...

G-d: Moses, do whatever you want....

I got my Psych GRE scores today. 670. Not what I expected after how confident I felt finishing the test, nor as good as I hoped I would get prior to going in. Still, high average score for any of my schools is a 720  (Washington University), so it's not like i'm that far behind. One of them,  Hartford, has an average of 550. Hartford I think has the highest acceptance rate of any of my schools, at like 8%. WU has one of the lowest, at about 2%. So it's not that it's bad, just that it won't help me like I thought it would.


Stephanie came out last weekend. Sadly only from saturday night to monday morning, but at least we got to see each other again. nearly 3 months is far too long. The good news is that she'll be coming back out again on the 20th, and possibly again for new years. And after that I'll be done with everything and can make it out to Tucson more often.

In other news. We put a christmas tree in easy street at Patton today, and the we made ornaments for it with the patients. It was actually a lot of fun, and other than the times when they get cookies it was the happiest I had seen most of them all year. It's easy to be cynical at a place like that, saying something like "they've committed a crime and need to be locked up". But it is a mental hospital, and a lot of them (though certainly not all) committed their crime *because* of a mental illness, and simply didn't understand what they were doing. It's nice to see them really enjoying something.

So i've been sick since last monday. nothing awful, just constantly there, sometimes bad, sometimes not. It's more or less a cough, though my throat is only occasionaly sore. I'll feel fine for 5 or 6 hours, and then have 10 minutes of a coughing attack. sunday night was the worst - i spent a good hour coughing up what felt like the better part of my left lung. Not fun.

I tried taking nyquil monday night, hoping that i'd be able to sleep through the night that way. Wow. Nyquil has to be one of the most vile tasting substances on the face of the earth. Combine that with how groggy I was the next morning, and I don't have the slightest clue how people can take this stuff. It's almost worse than the cough itself.

I'm really hoping I get better soon. Stephanies coming out to redlands on saturday, and we havne't seen each other in forever. : /

In other news, of the applications due december 15th ( i have 4 more due after that now), the only one I haven't written my letter of intent for is Oregon. I'm not positive i'm still going to apply there. They've got a good program, but I don't really know if they have the same research interests as me. It's weird the way they talk about it, and i'm still trying to find out more. Everything after the letter is a cake walk, and I hope to finally send out the first completed applications this week.
January 10th. I just gotta keep repeating that date. January 10th. It's when my last app is due. and then i'm done. free. Oh wow, I can't wait

Also, I'm rereading the Golden Compass. I'm sure the movie will be awful, and probably leave out everything that the books made you think about, but whatever. I'm still going to see it. I can bitch afterwards.

~Dustin

My advisor sent this to me, she thought I'd get a kick out of it.
absolutely hilarious. I want to meet the person who made this.

getting a wake up call from my supervisor at 7:30 (10 minutes before my alarm goes off) telling me that i'm not working today and i can sleep in.

bottles of water at 7/11 that say "caffeine free", "fat free",  or "sodium free". I saw all three this morning.

what i could have sworn was a 12 year old driving a u-haul down my street this morning at like 50 mph.


that it's 2:31 in the afternoon, i've been up since 7:30, and I have yet to do an ounce of work, despite wanting to get through three letters of intent by next monday. : /

I've finished the first draft of my first letter. both my adviser and my uncle (a college english professor and dean) offered to look over it for me. I'm really stuck trying to work out how to best approach it though.
Basically, this is supposed to be my way of explaining to the graduate program why they should invest in me. Since most of these schools are going to be looking at a few hundred applicants for only a few spots (Fordham, the letter i'm working on right now, had 450 applicants last year and took 12), my GPA and GRE scores only get me in the door. My written statement is what gets me really considered.
Part of that statement includes explaining my theoretical background and my reasons for wanting to be involved in psychology. Truth be told, both of those go back to having tourrettes, and having gone to doctor after doctor for years on end. that's what made me reason I wanted to be in psychology, just knowing that I wanted to contribute to helping someone else like they did.
The problem is, i don't want it to come off as if i'm "playing the tourrettes card". I'm worried that if i approach it wrong, it could look like i'm saying "oh, look what i've overcome, pity and then accept me please". this isn't at all what i want. instead, I want it to be "look, this is where i am, and this is how i got there. that's it".
It's tough to do though.

Now that i've wasted another 10 minutes of this day i'm going to *try* to finish up the second draft of this letter. bleh.

maybe since Fordham used to be a strictly catholic college I should listen to some catholic music.

6h42 minutes. I recognized each of my final 4 opponents as, at the very least, winning players. I knew a decent number of the final 20 or so by at least reputation. This was a much more challenging 20rebuy than most of the ones I've played in the past. I had 3 very lucky spots throughout the tourney, so I can't say it was my best played. Still, I managed to avoid some difficult situations, and even when I found myself somewhere ugly, I think I played the hands well enough to be +EV.





In other news, the air outside is awful. I think the wind turned towards redlands today, so there's a thick cloud of dust, ash, and smoke in the air. You can taste it as soon as you open the door. It's really disgusting. On the plus side Pauala called me this morning at 7:30 to tell me that there would be no groups today, since the patients aren't allowed out of the units for the second day in a row (yesterday I showed up and had to leave after 15 minutes since they were locked down then too). After not getting to sleep until almost 2 last night this was a nice bit of good news.

It took me almost 3 hours to get through the physiological psych chapter in my GRE book yesterday. I couldn't care less about The Anatomical Subdivisions of the Brain, Neural Transmission, or Postsynaptic Potentials.
Well, I shouldn't say I couldn't care less. Obviously it's important to understand what causes psychological disorders to the field of psychology in general. But since I don't plan to go into psychiatry, the actually physiology of disease isn't as importance to me as understanding the therapeutic techniques used to help those with them. This isn't to say that I find all of the physiology to be dull, but memorizing countless brain structures and their many overlapping functions is mind-numbing, tedious work. I'm half tempted to just admit I won't remember half of them and chalk it up with "well, there's just going to be some questions I'll plan to skip". I only have 3 chapters left, so once I go through them I"ll decide if it's really worth the 4 or 5 hours of creating and using flash cards to learn everything I can about neurology.

~Dustin

So after the Santa anas this weekend the mountains are up in flames. The last time this happened in Redlands was 4 years ago.
Its very strange laying in bed knowing that only 10 or so miles away people are evacuating their homes. Even worse, people are losing their homes. Since theres a few miles of flat ground between here and the foot of the mountains we should be safe. But my important and valuable stuff is close easy enough to grab quickly if we have to leave. I don't really have that much here. I can't really see them from my bedroom window, just the orange glow in the sky. I guess if I can tomorrow I'll put stuff in the car. Still, last time the fire was bigger and closer. If they can get it contained soon, I can't imagine us having any serious problems here

I can't imagine how awful it would be to lose everything in a fire like so many people have the last few days. Hopefully its not something I'll ever have to experience. And hopefully its not something that anyone I care about will ever have to either.

I need to stop eating pizza. I swear, any time I do i wind up feeling like I can't move any more. It's like mcdonalds, as soon as i eat it i just feel dead. I have no desire to do anything but sit on the couch and not breath.

I used to be able to go through an entire large thin crust cheese from pizza hut. but after half of that tonight i feel like i'm ready to curl up in a ball on the couch and never move again. bleh